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There was something about her mischievous smile that made you know she was hiding something. Il see her sitting out on her veranda every clear night in the summer with that certain look on her face I can not quiet describe for I could only see it for a split second before she blew out the candles she had lodged so carefully on the dew covered grass. Every night from behind the rustling oak trees I would watch her, hoping to discover the secret of the smile that haunted me in my dreams.
Once again I found myself entranced in her smile for that one moment before her fragile lips blow out the tiny light, and after this, once again I walk quietly by the slow moving river. I hope that all that is happening will have disappeared when I return back to the place I am expected to call home. As I get closer to the mental institution I hear the familiar sound of this so called home, it was just a minuet walk away and the crying and screaming could be heard much farther if it wasn’t for the strong gust of wind tonight. I knew this well, the screaming wouldn’t stop; it became a part of the atmosphere of the woods, and a part of my life. My life, in which I am told not to make up stories with happy endings to hide my sad past, and that is why I am here.
Now that I have arrived I better ask Dr. Howard what he has done with my keys, “Mrs. Farewell, could you tell Dr. Howard I am here to see him, it’s rather urgent?” She grinned at me unaware I knew about her divorcé, “and Christine,” I added to her, “, it really is too bad.”
“What’s bad?” She replied a hint or worry in her voice.
“Sorry about the marriage, dear. I’m sorry but it could have never worked with us either, my wife is waiting at home. Now where is Dr. Howard?” I said quickly looking around, this silly nurse really had to get the doctor, and I mean I really do need my keys.
“Oh, dear, right this way I’ll get you to Howard, you really need you’re medicine.” She gave me a push towards the door.
“Yes, I do need a bit of medicine for my son, but, how’d you know that?” I stopped then remembered why I was here, “Where are my keys?” I said sternly, “I need my keys!”
“Help, Johnson is acting up again!” The panicking nurse said, two man came in hurriedly and grabbed me, “Come’ on we need you to come and get you’re medicine,” she said quietly and calmly as I was pushed, by the burly men into the doctors office.
“Keys!” I said struggling to free myself, “I only need my damn keys! My wife Laura, no sorry my wife Dourine, I mean, I need to see my wife, what is her name? I NEED MY KEYS!” Panic was running through my blood chilling me as I mumbled names trying to remember my wife’s.
“You don’t know her name because you don’t have a wife. You’re 20, you don’t have children, and you do not have any keys,” He was trying to trick me, he wanted to keep my keys.
“I… really, need… my… KEYS!” If they would just give me my keys.
“Ah… found you’re keys!” The nurse said holding up something long and silver. But just as I was about to say that those where not my keys I felt a small unmistakable pain of a needle, I shivered and became weak my face covered un beads of sweat. As I looked into the mirror on the wall by the doctors desk a confused, beaten, and frustrated young man looked back.
“What was it this time?” I asked, knowing now that once again I had not taken my medicine and had suffered with my problem of making up stories so I could not remember what happened in my shadowy past. I must have wondered into the woods when my medicine was fine, then by the time I had reached the mental institution it had worn off again.
Dr. Howard paused for a moment walking to his desk, “Take a seat Johnson, it wont take long.” Slightly embarrassed I sat down in a soft chair in front of his desk. “Johnson, I know this is very difficult and all but you really must stop sneaking off, you take you’re medicine to late and we have this same conversation over and…” Dr. Howard stopped talking to me and noticed I was glancing out the window, “are you even paying attention?”
“Yes,” I replied, but I wasn’t paying attention, I was actually starring out the window into the night where a tiny pink light was gliding across the dew covered grass. Lost in there faint glow I did not pay the smallest bit of attention to the Dr.
“Either you take you’re medicine or you’re going closer watch and care, no more roaming around…” the doctor continued until he noticed that I was now standing up, nose against the window pane, my breath fogging it up the glow was getting brighter, but the doctor made no acknowledgement to it as he tried to pull me away from the window back to my chair.
“Doctor, don’t… I mean don’t you see that light?” I stumbled holding his shoulder and turning him towards the window.
“I guess we need to work on you’re treatment Johnson, there’s no light out there. Let me see…” he pulled out his folder and I looked back out the window but the tiny light had disappeared like it hadn’t even been there.
“Sorry doctor, I just thought I saw…” I stopped talking and leaned foreword my head in my hands and silently cried.
Why me? Why did I create a fantasy world for my self? As I gasped for breath I remembered something; it seamed as though my mind was being pulled into a different happy life…
It had been a beautiful day. The sun was shinning, the wind was not weak but calm and soothing, there where a few puffy clouds floating along in the clear blue sky. Despite the beauty of that day I was haunted by a dark cloud of hatred hanging over me. My brother had stolen my girlfriend and made her his own, I had loved her and this was what turned brother against brother. Although I never spoke of it but the mere thought of him filled me with hate and anger.
My brother not knowing this had dragged me into the woods looking for a place for a cabin, ‘the cabin would be another place he could take his precious Dalai’ this thought went through my head like a dagger. He was out of my view because he was gone ahead to check the area. “Hey Tim, I bet Dalai doesn’t even like the woods, I guess you wouldn’t know that though you hardly ever spend time with her!” I said smirking.
“Of chores she does when she was little she…” His voice trailed off then I heard a cry for help.
***
“Johnson, Johnson! Wake-up!” I was starring at Dr. Howard, “Thank god, what happened? Are you okay?” He was checking my pulse while he spoke.
“What? Who… where? Where is my brother?” He was looking at me with strain in his eyes.
“You’re brother? I’m sorry, but you won’t remember this. You’re not even supposed to know he exists, I mean existed of chores.
“Dead? Did he die in the woods… he needed help but I, I…”
“How come you suddenly remember this Johnson? That day when you where in the woods, that’s the reason you’re hear. “He stopped and said quietly, “You, you killed him Johnson.” These words echoed in Johnson’s mind even after he had been put to bed. He did not sleep that night nor many nights after that. The next few days he also took his medicine and memories of the day in the woods kept him occupied instead of the girl who was sitting quietly on her veranda not so far away.
That very girl stood up and brushed off her skirt. Then she went and blew out the candles, as she did so she looked across to the trees and once again for the forth night in a row the young man wasn’t watching her. At first when she had seen him she was startled at someone starring contentedly at her every night, but after a while it became a sense of comfort and familiarity, because the rest of her life was far from that.
Tonight as she entered her house she went directly to the stairs leading to the basement, because of her hours outside thinking she knew exactly how to complete her task tonight. The basement was her storeroom, for all the gadgets she used along with all the treasures she earned with them. She gathered what she needed and set out into the woods towards the mental institute.
First of all she set off a distraction, it was her own invention, pink glowing orbs that would float flower to flower, then the patients see them and are frightened, causing udder ciaos. The workers would all be busy pulling them away from the windows getting several minuets of safe time until the lights vanished.
After I had planted my distraction I attempted again what I had attempted several nights in a row, but had failed. Soon if I did not complete the task I would need to think of another plan. But that wouldn’t happen, I was sure tonight I would do it. By now I had reached the roof and I pulled myself belly down across the roof until I reached a small skylight. Carefully I removed it with a sharp cutter and placed it on the roof, then I quickly hopped in.
The hall ways where empty of people but where filled with screams of horror and loss. I looked around, tonight I had found the perfect entrance, right across from a doctor’s office. The precise doctor’s office she had to break into, doctor Howard’s. There where no lights on in the room so I picked the lock easily and the door creaked open. I went to the doctor’s desk and pulled the drawer out and picked up what I had finally been able to obtain. But then I stopped, this was way to easy, just as the thought occurred to me I heard a shuffle of feet approaching the door.
***
Tonight id do it. Tonight I’d know what had been bugging me and what had puzzled me for the past days. Johnson pulled his door open and started through the maze of hallways leading to Dr. Howard’s office. When he heard amongst the screams a small tap on the floor. Thinking he’d be caught out of bed he quickened his pace until he was outside the open office, but when he looked in he noticed the office was empty. He hurried to the file cabinet and shuffled through the files until he reached his, when a darkness filled him, the last thing he saw was a beautiful girl appearing from the shadows and hitting him hard round the head with one of the doctor’s trophy.
When Johnson awoke a sweet aroma filled his lungs and he sat up to find himself in a very clammy room on a large chesterfield in front of a dazzling pink fire which looked very familiar. “Where, where am I?” he asked to no one in particular.
“It doesn’t really matter as I am asking the questions. I know you are watching me, you’ve been stalking me, and you are from the other side of town aren’t you?” She asked not letting him answer, “You guys are so pathetic, I mean you just try and stalk real thieves until you can get you’re hands on the money first! You where trying to get the map from the crackpot doctor’s office weren’t you?”
Johnson buried his head in his hands and said quietly “what map?” when he saw the serious look the girl had given him he continued, “I was trying to find my…” Then he stopped. If she learned he was a mental patient she would bring him back to the institute… “my… my god you’re pretty.” He tried.
“Nice, but as you’ve been stalking me now I’m not letting you out of my site. You’re coming to Scrivers with me; he will know what to do with you.” She stopped and threw an old piece of bread at Johnson, “hurry up and eat!”
After about ten minuets Johnson was being pushed out the house’s door and onto the lawn he now recognized as a place he had spied on the girl so he could retrieve a map for his boss. Both of them had believed he was a spy and I thief for a gang across town, and neither of them had the slightest clue that once again Johnson had made up a story because his medicine had worn off. They would continue to think he was a thief until he was cured or was given his medicine, which seemed to be the most impossible thing as the two of them walked through alleyways and streets. Finally they reached a dingy door on the side of a low building that, most people wouldn’t have noticed the door because the ivy creeping up the wall had also continued growing onto the wall. Just as Johnson was wondering how they where going to enter the girl, who’s named tuned out to be Anna, pulled the doormat out from under there feet to reveal a small trap door. “Where are we…”
“Shut up and follow me.” Anna lead him down a corridor lit only by lanterns flickering over there heads, as he followed Anna, he laughed silently at how pathetic this hideout was compared to his on the other side of the town. But soon he swallowed his own thoughts, the room they had entered had a high ceiling as they where under ground, he looked up and saw moonlight glistening through stain glass windows depicting the capture of a man and his violent torturing. On his left and right side golden walls covered in ancient tapestries, the floor seamed to be made of a beautiful oak that reflected the fireplace on the other side of the narrow hall, that stood behind a strong and forceful looking man who was walking towards them. Immediately Anna fell into a low bow and shoved Johnson who followed her act.
“What do you bring me today?” He forced, “More importantly did you finally manage to get that map?”
“Yes, of chores I got the stupid map, but this…” She went through her bag, “This is an excellent distraction, and the warmest fire, you don’t need wood either. Just strike it with a match and it will last for hours… and these mini ones will last 5 minuets…” She had several sheets of metal that was a dark red color she tossed one in the fireplace and it turned a bright pink as the flames grew almost double the size.”
“Excellent! Now what is this guy doing here, he’s dressed like a 50 year old lady!” Until then Johnson didn’t relies he was wearing a long white night dress, he turned scarlet red.
“He’s a spy, I caught him… weird getup though isn’t it.” Anna said laughing coldly.
“Those so called thieves across town, hopeless! Anyway, he’s you’re assistant from now on.”
“ Help this girl? I’m a man and a way better thief then this little…”
“I don’t need an assistant, epically not a sexist spy who wears dresses…”
“I don’t wear dresses...” Johnson said…
“Really, you know those things that cover you’re body and are skirts at the bottom? That’s a dress Johnson you idiot!”
“Quiet both of you! Anna, he will be you’re assistant he will do what you say, and what I say, got it?” Neither of them refused but they nodded, Scrivers had a very strong sound in his voice now and a threatening look about him. “Now that that is out of the way, that map you’ve got is the blueprint for the mansion on 21st street, Doctor Howard used to be a contractor. He keeps this in his desk to show it off I suppose, I used to know him and he seems the type to brag a lot. What I need is…” He showed them a picture of a sparkling necklace. “This is a very expensive diamond necklace from a famous French jeweler, give it to a man wearing a long black coat and red belt that will meet you 5 o’clock tomorrow morning at the downtown record shop, don’t be late he nor I will tolerate it.”
Without saying anything Anna and Johnson bent in a low bow and turned around, he had noticed Anna quickening her pace as she approached the door to the steps leading outside. When he finally caught up Anna was outside reading the map by the faint glow of her pink fire, he couldn’t help but notice how her power made her seem even prettier then usual. “You’re going to be keeping watch while I steal the necklace… come!” She hastily dropped the pink flame which extinguished a second later and started off in a quick run, “We need to get this done in the next hour, its already 3am.” She panted while running. Cold air was filling his lungs as he kept running and he felt like he was going to collapse, and to his relief they stopped near a large build, “Thank god we are here, I’m so tired.” He said catching his breath, but as soon as he said this Anna laughed, and started to climb up the side of the giant house.
“We haven’t even started yet! Men, you’re guys are so lazy.” Johnson was exhausted and frightened as they jumped from roof to roof until they where standing on a wall next to a large mansion. “You wait here, send up these flares,” she handed him several small explosives, “if someone comes. Just wait here okay?” Anna sounded annoyed.
“Yeah,” Johnson said quickly avoiding her eyes. As soon as the word had escaped his mouth Anna was off, she jumped down over the wall they where standing and within seconds disappeared into the shadow of the mansion. Making sure Anna was busy opening the door Johnson followed her carefully dropping the flares in his wake.
***
Anna threw away all her thoughts that buzzed noisily in her head, and focused on the task, get the necklace. Once she had broken the door locks and disarmed the security system in only several minuets she knew this would be much easier then getting the map. She scaled the marble steps 3 at a time until she had reached the top floor, she took no time to look down the steps and see Johnson creeping quietly behind her. The top floor was magnificent. Golden framed pictures hung from the walls, and diamond chandeliers from the ceiling. She ignored all the expensive decorations and headed straight to the office, she had studied its position on the map before they had come.
She opened the unlocked door and entered a large but cramped room, the window stood open slightly and the long white curtains rustled gently in the wind. Anna went right to it and started shifting pictures and certificates on the wall to try and find a secret safe which was popular among the rich, almost immediately she was starring at a small brass safe on the wall behind a wedding picture. The combination lock was very tiny and almost hard to see, but this was no problem for Anna she was very talented at breaking locks and… ‘click’ it was open. “Who’s in there?” Said a loud voice, “I’m armed!” Anna ran towards the window and pushed it farther open jumped out and grabbed on the sill for her life. Then a loud bang sounded from the entrance hall, the man swore loudly then pounded off leaving Anna hanging her grip loosening under the weight of her body.
“Hurry up, he’ll be back in a second!” Anna heard Johnson whisper… “Anna?”
“The window… help!” She croaked trying to hold herself up, her fingers slipped and she fell. But she only fell a few inches before Johnson’s sticky hand clamped around her arm and pulled her up, “Johnson, thank god… I was falling and…” Johnson placed a finger to his lip and crept to the revealed safe in the wall, Anna watched as he pulled open the already unlocked vault and sighed.
“Nothing. There is nothing in here.” Johnson said patting around the inside of the vault. “Nothing…” Anna heard him say to himself.
“What?” She ran behind him and tried to see over his shoulder into the vault but he was much taller then herself, her question didn’t need to be answered the safe was empty, she knew they didn’t have time to look around so she gave the wall under the safe a punch out of frustration and a hallow echo seemed to trigger something in her brain. Because instead of fleeing quickly she dug into one of her many pockets and emerged with a mini flashlight. “By the way thanks for saving my life…” She said quietly not seeing the grin appear on Johnson’s face. Anna looked in the safe with her flash light and noticed on the bottom of it there was a little dent, she pulled on it and just like she had expected it revealed a secret compartment, the diamond necklace laid carefully on a black velvet cushion.
“Come on Anna, he’s coming…” Anna turned to Johnson and they silently ran down the stairs and left, the owner of the house still looking at shattered vials Anna took to be Johnson’s distraction.
“I can’t believe what you did back there, I’m so…” Anna started as they slowly made there way downtown.
“It’s okay, where in this together now I guess.” Johnson looked at her and for once tonight they laughed.
When they arrived outside the record shop they looked in the dusty window to find it wasn’t open yet. Anna cursed loudly and looked around. “Anna, look.” Johnson pointed down the road to a tall dark figure in the black coat and red belt Scrivers had told them about.
“Come on,” Anna said, they walked towards him and merely passed him the parcel and continued walking, in fact Anna had elbowed Johnson in the ribs when he extended his arm for a hand shake.
“That was quick.” Johnson said, “Do we have to go back to Scrivers with the money?”
“This is ours, Scrivers will already have his. How about some breakfast?” They did have breakfast and after that they still had a heavy bag filled with gold and silver. Johnson decided this gang of thieves was way better then his old group, plus he had a very beautiful intelligent partner who had now stopped making fun of his night gown.
*end of chapter... please reveiw
This is a horrible story, itd probally be better you didnt even bother read it...
The Rogue Star
I’m not going to go try and convince you that I am as normal as you, like most power craving stars would. I am famous, I have been since I was 13, and I know that I’m different from you. I hate stars, prancing around in Hollywood, glittering high heel shoes, black leather shoes, so many shoes. I guess that means I’m hypocritical. I mean I don’t hate myself, of course I’m just a singer from Newfoundland, I write my own songs so I get quite a lot of publicity. I guess I really don’t hate all stars. I like Liv Tyler, you know the actress. She was in one of my favorite movies; me and my sister went to see it. ‘Empire Records’, I remember on my 15th birthday going into St. John’s to see the movie with my sister, she is 2 years younger then me, but I figured she was old enough to see it. She was always the smarter of us, that’s kind of why I pushed myself so much, to over achieve. I mean when she was 10 she was repeating Shakespeare; I was 12 when I could do that. So anyway we went to see this movie, it was brilliant. I nearly died laughing. My sister however, wasn’t too impressed; she kept saying it was too over dramatized. She was just uncomfortable with it, but she didn’t dare say that, she knew I adored Liv Tyler. So I decided to bye her lunch.
She loved the food court, I enjoy it. I did enjoy I should say, I never want to eat in one of those places again. So anyway she loved it, so since we lived three hours away it was kind of an unwritten rule to go to the food court when we went to St. John’s. I chose to write songs at the strangest times, whenever I was inspired, right? So I got an idea when my sister little Amy stood there with her tray of Chinese food, the fortune cookie stood out to me. You must know the feeling, if you’re a picky eater that is, you hated Chinese food but deep down you wanted the fortune cookie so bad. So this is what I wrote: I Want a Fortune Cookie. I wrote it at the top of my page and underlined it, a good song title; it could be used as a metaphor. Well I told you how Amy loved to read, and recite what she had read even better. So she said it, a bit too loud. A gang of those kids who spend all their time at the mall laughed, a bit too loud. Then everything went down hill, a little boy of about 11 pointed at me. I don’t know how he knew me; he must have been at that age where you listen to a lot of random music, he probably listened to it because he wanted to be considered a teenager when being a teenager really was no big deal. Anyway he recognized me and pointed me out; he must have heard the fortune cookie thing so he yelled ‘Tammy Grey wants a fortune cookie!’ he yelled it a bit too loud.
I really did get my fortune cookie; I could say it was worth it. But that would be a lie. So that’s probably why I like Liv Tyler so much, I mean, if my sister had liked that movie none of the fortune cookie fiasco would have happened. So anyway, I hate most stars, because that’s the kind of thing that would make them happy, it would make their day. This is the same reason I hate the food court now. My sister doesn’t like it either. But now after she watched Lord of the Rings she’s an even bigger Liv Tyler fan than me. So that’s why I’m not going to try and convince you I’m normal.
Thoughts, words, and memories buzzed through my mind, but could not over throw the hum of the florescent lights, flickering above the press room. I opened my mouth and lights from cameras flashed, my mouth was dry and tired as I formed a sentence trying to not get so personal, “Uh… yeah it is difficult.” I coughed my voice was dry and rasping, “I mean… I can’t really go out in public without getting noticed. I hate it.” The reporters who, obviously didn’t care what I had to say nodded their heads and jotted quickly on there note pads that advertised the certain company they where with. There was one lady, who was really getting on my nerves; she was tall and slender with a horrid leather jacket. It wasn’t the way she dressed that bothered me, but the way she only nodded or agreed with something after all the big journalists from CBC or The Advertiser agreed, and then after that, she would turn up her nose in disapproval.
After the press conference was over, and the kids had gotten all their autographs, and all the grown up had gotten an autograph for my kid please? I walked quietly out the back door of the Mount Peton Hotel. My escort was closely following and quickly took the chance to help me into my black S.U.V; I hated it when she did that, help me in a vehicle? I’d really rather stay outside and look at the flowers then have an elder lady open a door for me. Not saying I don’t like flowers, I love flowers, well I used to. Not that I hate them, to say I don’t like flowers would be really eating my own words. I remember in the town I grew up in, we always had town wide competitions for flower gardens, my parents where never enthusiastic. Maybe, that’s why I loved flowers so much. Not having a garden on my own lawn always made me long for a garden even more, I used to sneak over to our neighbors garden every day after school, to visit her luscious jungle of pansies, tulips, bleeding hearts, and ever flower you can imagine.
Now I don’t mean to say my parents were mean, they were wonderful, it’s just at times they could be very strict. One day after my visit to the flower garden I tiptoed quietly into the kitchen, Amy was at the time 12 and still did her homework on the kitchen table. “TAMMY GREY!” I froze, my mother was holding my guitar a frown on her face, “Your second album is not going to write and record its self! You have homework too.”
I had been at loss for words, I never could say things right, that why I sang. Not for some thousands of dollars, “I… I just got back from school.” She wasn’t going to buy it, I knew that and she knew I knew that.
“No, you got back form the neighbor’s garden. Now work on those songs.”
Anyway, that’s why I don’t completely hate flowers, but if my mother had just liked flowers I would love them. So anyway, I would rather stay and smell the flowers then let someone else, in this case a lady who had trouble walking, open the door for me. I mean I’m a star, but I’m not a child. I’m 25 now and my popularity really has grown, of course, I’m still not one of those power craving stars from Hollywood with more pairs of shoes then they have decency. I had a long drive coming up; I was on tour with the press. In Corner Brook next, I’d be singing at the Pepsi Center, and then another boring press conference where I’d have to answer less then satisfactory questions to another set of reporters that didn’t care what I was saying. I really hated that, one second they’ll be smiling and nodding and then, like the slender lady in the leather jacket, they’ll stick up their nose and laugh at you in piercing voices.
I had been sitting there and saying nothing for about two hours, finally my escort opened her mouth, “In the glove compartment, I have a card, could you pass it to me?” A card, I really hated cards. But I still passed it to her with a smile; she kept in on her lap but soon opened it and began reading it. No big problem, I mean the Trans Canada was hardly ever busy 20 minutes outside of Deer Lake plus it was a few hours till complete darkness, so reading the card while driving wasn’t bothering me. The card, that was what bothered me so much. I never liked cards, I might have if I had gotten more, not that I don’t get cards, now that I’m famous that is. When I was in grade school, I remember everyone up to grade 6 was in the same school, despite this there was still only 50 or 60 kids in our school. Every Valentine’s Day, Christmas, and even Easter children would give cards to each other. Cards in different colors, sizes, shapes, with different poems, and sayings, the only cards I got where ones with sly jokes on them. I was never a popular kid in school; they made fun of me because I wasn’t exactly normal, I always wore my hair in a tight bun, but my personality was even tighter. I was always to busy trying to be perfect, and smart, and learning to play the guitar. So I never got any cards. But then, after I was discovered and my album was put out, suddenly I had the most cards in my class. I hated them, because no one ever cared about giving me cards and I was still the same person. I wasn’t one of those Hollywood stars; I was more to myself, kind of like Liv Tyler she wasn’t like most stars.
So I was glaring out the tinted window, it was getting darker as Marble Mountain drew closer, it was off season on the hill, so tourist taking a break from Gros Mourne could casually go for a walk up the mountain on their way into the city. The escort was still glaring at her card, and I was still despising it. I looked out the window to see Humber Village, flowers were filling the town and the mountains around it. I didn’t mind the flowers, what I minded was the fact at this moment I didn’t think I’d ever get to see flowers again. The headlights from the S.U.V, reflected in a large spear of light, or better known as a Caribou’s eye. Glass shattered and I could hear the lady scream, there was no doubt as I looked over, she was dead. And that’s when I passed out.
So I sit here, by myself in the hospital bed, the room is so white, it’s bleached white. The sun is peaking through my curtains and casting a beam of light on my lap, my room is filled with many things, things normally I would hate. But for some reason I can’t but smile when I see flowers in vases; pansies, tulips, daisies and several others that I would later get up and enjoy their fragrances, but for now I enjoyed looking at them. Not like I ever really hated them. Despite this; I’m not going to try and make this a Hallmark moment, most of the flowers and cards, where probably just from a few fans. So I still hate cards, I still am just fond of flowers, and I still hate most stars. And of all I was starting to hate myself the most. The lady had died, that had been obvious, at least I’m alive, but I still hate everything. I was thinking then for almost an hour about all the things I hate, and if I really hate them, but I was also thinking about the fact that despite the cards, and flowers no one had shown any sympathy for me. Then the door creaked open softly, I was expecting: some uptight nurse to come in and give me a series of painful needles, but she didn’t come in.
Amy entered slowly her hands behind her back as she smiled and walked towards me, “I heard you wanted something. So… I ran over to the food court and…” she didn’t need to continue speaking she just held out her hands and placed a crispy fortune cookie in my hand. Suddenly I didn’t hate it, maybe it was the moment, or the large does of medicine I had been given, but what ever the reason, suddenly I didn’t hate fortune cookies, or flowers, or even cards, and surprisingly I didn’t even hate stars anymore because: that’s who I am. I already said I don’t hate myself, I was kind of starting to think that, but… but now I don’t hate anything. I am happy about everything I am happy to be a star, because that’s what I am, that’s what we all are, a star, in Hollywood or even in Newfoundland